Mother's Day always gives me time to reflect.  I like to go back in memory of the times with my mother.  We had some good times and bad times, mostly because I could be hard-headed a lot, but, there was love.  The things that she taught me are immeasurable.  How do you start? From learning to love yourself, respecting yourself, educating yourself, bettering yourself, pushing yourself, always strive higher, it's always darkest before the dawn, don't lose strength, and keep God first.  The list is endless.

Now that I am a mother, I appreciate it so much.  Others were able to conceive and have babies, no problem.  But, my Caleb and my Kelsey are definitely my angels.  See, there was time when I didn't think that I would ever be able to carry a child.  I got pregnant, no problem.  Staying pregnant was the problem.  Many miscarriages, ectopic pregnancies took its toll on my sanity, on my soul, on my being.  I cried out, and finally surrendered.  If it was meant to be, it would be, if not, it would not.  

Now how blessed am I to have not one, but two children. They are handsome and beautiful, poised, well-spoken, intelligent, and just really great kids.  I like to say that I had a hand in this, someway, somehow. But, those first five critical years, they were wrapped in love of their Nana, and their Great-Grandmother, G.G.  Nothing but love, consistency and boundaries.  I appreciate those mothers, my mother, my grandmother, these generations that taught me how to be a mom.  As I look at myself, I no longer see myself. The face that I see is that of my mother.  I look like her, I talk her, I think like her, I sound like her.  I just want to be the mom that she was with me and my older brother to my own Caleb and Kelsey.

So thank you Mom and G.G. for showing me how to be strong woman.  To show me that in the depths of darkness, you have to faith that the light is ahead.  Thank you for showing me to fight, because without that spirit, I would not be here.  That's a combination of both of your spirits connecting in me.  And for that I am truly appreciative.   You are loved.